Thursday, October 6, 2011

Life comes at you fast

It has been a while since I've visited my own blog.  Life has been insane!  But the ride has been good.  Among the stacks of homework, work, volunteering, and being a husband I find no time to write down my thoughts.  So now that I have about fifteen minutes of breathing room, I think I'll do it.

I recently downloaded the newest Coldplay single "Paradise" which I recommend to anyone who needs a good boost for their day.  It's absolutely beautiful.  If the band could see my post, I would tell them thank you for the inspiration, beauty and musical perfection that soothes my inner ear and vibrates the bones to nirvana.   Some how they continue to express their talents with notes and lyrics that I feel describes me to a T.  Its oddly wonderful to be able to find expression to what makes me, me, when I can just flip on my i pod and hear it being sung.

The weather has turned to cool, crisp, Autumn.  My library has smelled like paradise the past couple of days.  I find much solace, and sanctuary within the walls of books.  The old building itself is due for termination coming next year, which is sad, but needed.  Especially when the doors don't close all the way, the ceiling leaks and the heater is bipolar.  But I love the people, the atmosphere and the friendships that are all contained within its rock walls.
The feeling of connection has been strengthen the past week by the reality of me leaving its comfort and striking out into the great unknown.  But before I could walk away, depressed and uncertain, I was offered a new position to be a sub, and travel between three different libraries, once every week.  It was a moment that I have only felt a few times in my life.  One where you feel so strongly about a decision that will change your life forever, where you give up something good, for something better.  I was torn, indecisive and degraditated.
I cried out to my maker and he answered my pathetic call, with this compromise.
Now, I can keep my toes in the water, focus on school, and (greatest of all) spend more time at home, with my radiant wife.

To all those who I work with, I love you like family, you all have influenced me for the best. I'll never forget our experiences for as long as I live.  And to Kendall if you ever read this, you will always  be a Philistine to me.

To my wife, thank you for loving me, urging me to be better than I am.

To God, thank you for being out there, to hear me and to show me that you care for this particular particle of dust.